Favorite Office Monologue Ever

"What is my perfect crime? I break into Tiffany’s at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No. I go for the chandelier; it’s priceless. As I’m taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It’s her father’s business. She’s Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don’t trust her. Besides, I love the cold. Thirty years later I get a postcard. I have a son. And he’s the Chief of Police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She’s been waiting for me all these years. She’s never taken another lover. I don’t care. I don’t show up. I go to Berlin. That’s where I stashed the chandelier."

Six More

Sorry, nothing too exciting to mention. Just been helping my parents move and watching crappy movies. We're up to 40 now. I might update the list with every 5 or 10 I see as to keep this from getting too out of control.

40. Happening, The
39. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
38. Eye, The
37. Mamma Mia
36. Jumper
35. Promotion, The
34. Charlie Bartlett
33. Zombie Strippers
32. Drillbit Taylor
31. Definitely, Maybe
30. Incredible Hulk, The
29. Journey To The Center Of The Earth
28. House Bunny, The
27. Baby Mama
26. Semi-Pro
25. Hancock
24. Meet Dave
23. Hellboy 2
22. What Happens In Vegas
21. You Don't Mess With The Zohan
20. Step Brothers
19. Wanted
18. Love Guru, The
17. Forgetting Sarah Marshall
16. Fools Gold
15. Pineapple Express
14. Australia
13. Kung Fu Panda
12. Horton Hears A Who
11. Tropic Thunder
10. Deception
9. Vantage Point
8. Role Models
7. Get Smart
6. Burn After Reading
5. Iron Man
4. Changeling
3. My Blueberry Nights
2. Dark Knight, The
1. WALL-E

Finally, A Crappier Movie Than Indy Jones

34. Happening, The
33. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
32. Mamma Mia
31. Charlie Bartlett
30. Drillbit Taylor
29. Definitely, Maybe
28. Incredible Hulk, The
27. Journey To The Center Of The Earth
26. Baby Mama
25. Semi-Pro
24. Hancock
23. Meet Dave
22. Hellboy 2
21. What Happens In Vegas
20. You Don't Mess With The Zohan
19. Step Brothers
18. Wanted
17. Love Guru, The
16. Forgetting Sarah Marshall
15. Fools Gold
14. Pineapple Express
13. Australia
12. Kung Fu Panda
11. Horton Hears A Who
10. Tropic Thunder
9. Vantage Point
8. Role Models
7. Get Smart
6. Burn After Reading
5. Iron Man
4. Changeling
3. My Blueberry Nights
2. Dark Knight, The
1. WALL-E

The Happening is astronomically bad. It's so bad you watch it to laugh at how bad it is. It is undoubtedly the basis for the Mark Wahlberg "Say hi to your mother for me" sketch on SNL. It's bad from the opening scene all the way through. I can't say it has NO redeeming qualities (it is definitely well shot and the budget clearly isn't small) but wow it's rough.

Some Funny Stuff

Since I generally only post narcissistic (sp?) jibber jabber (and why not? I rule) I figured I should probably share some stuff you might theoretically enjoy:

YouTube goodness:
Mario Kart Love Song
Dark Knight PSA (stolen from Ryan)
Glorious Baby Shower
Numa Numa Returns "Live Your Life" To The Internet
Stavenhagen's Food Pawn Shop
Pepperbee's Satisfaction Guaranteed
Dark Knight Spoilers (some of these are old, granted)

Other goodness:
Most Baffling Book Titles
Chattanooga Prostitution Ring
225 Demotivational Posters

Last but not least,
Triumph The Insult Comic Dog never, ever disappoints me.

Four More...

26. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
25. Charlie Bartlett
24. Drillbit Taylor
23. Definitely, Maybe
22. Incredible Hulk, The
21. Journey To The Center Of The Earth
20. Baby Mama
19. Semi-Pro
18. Hancock
17. Hellboy 2
16. You Don't Mess With The Zohan
15. Step Brothers
14. Love Guru, The
13. Forgetting Sarah Marshall
12. Pineapple Express
11. Kung Fu Panda
10. Horton Hears A Who
9. Tropic Thunder
8. Role Models
7. Get Smart
6. Burn After Reading
5. Iron Man
4. Changeling
3. My Blueberry Nights
2. Dark Knight, The
1. WALL-E

And Another Thing...

I forgot to share this before. Click here. It is wonderful and I recommend you all read it. Don't close it once you find out the subject matter, READ THE ENTIRE ARTICLE. Those of you who sympathize with this article like I do should save the link and share it with people as they harass you in the future. Every fan of this sport like myself knows how useful this can be.

Thanksgiving Day

I knocked off 4 1/2 movies on Thanksgiving. My ever-depressing friend Oddi brought up a good point: Who the fuck cares about this list?
Answer: Me. So yet again I am posting it. Also, it is a moderately original way of discussing movies (that is, you don't see movie reviewers posting a continually updated list of movies they see over the course of a year).

Anyways, added 4 of the 4 1/2 to the list. Should see the 2nd half of The Love Guru and all of a few others (Wanted) later.

I am going to include one-sentence reviews on this list from now on...

New additions in bold:

22. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull: Indy + ALIENS - Irony = Hilarious
21. Charlie Bartlett: No, seriously, Indiana Jones had ALIENS.
20. Definitely, Maybe: Indiana Jones definitely had ALIENS, someone thought "Maybe this is a good idea."
19. Incredible Hulk, The: A giant green monster walking around NYC is more believable than ALIENS in Indiana Jones.
18. Journey To The Center Of The Earth: Dinosaurs in the center of the earth but not ALIENS.
17. Semi-Pro: Will Farrell playing basketball... a lot more believable than ALIENS in Indy.
16. Hancock: Charlize Theron ruined this movie but not nearly as damaging as ALIENS.
15. You Don't Mess With The Zohan: Adam Sandler does Borat is a stupid idea, but less stupid than ALIENS.
14. Step Brothers: This movie was funny like ALIENS in Indy would've been if it was actually a joke.
13. Forgetting Sarah Marshall: Forgetting Indiana Jones will take a long, long time.
12. Pineapple Express: I forgot to mention that Indy survived a nuclear blast by hiding in an old refrigerator.
11. Kung Fu Panda: The base that held these nuclear weapons had two guards. Two.
10. Horton Hears A Who: How the Grinch stole Harrison Ford's dignity.
9. Tropic Thunder: I suspect Harrison Ford thought his role in Indiana Jones was sort of like Ben Stiller's in this movie.
8. Role Models: My role models are George Lucas and Steven Spielberg because they can rape Indiana Jones without any major consequences.
7. Get Smart: A great suggestion for George Lucas and Steven Spielberg.
6. Burn After Reading: Burn your Indy DVD after renting.
5. Iron Man: Irony man = Indiana Jones.
4. Changeling: This movie was the 2nd most depressing of the year. Can you guess the 1st?
3. My Blueberry Nights: What kind of kingdom is centered around a crystal skull?
2. Dark Knight, The: ALIENS killed Heath Ledger.
1. WALL-E: As good as Indiana Jones is bad.

Strange Encounters With Minor Celebrities

It has been a strange week.
Obviously, I live and breathe the Boston Red Sox. I know more about the Red Sox than most people I know and I just about never leave home without a Red Sox hat on my head.
As I do this, I get a lot of attention from strangers who want to offer their two cents on the Red Sox. Generally, I am okay with this, but a lot of times it gets annoying because it usually goes the same direction every single time.
Today, I stopped in an antique store in a part of Atlanta that I almost never visit. The store itself I had never been to and had I had even the slightest better plan for something to do, I would not have stopped, I was just bored and I generally like looking at antique stores.
As I am sifting through books and records a tall African American man approaches me and begins to ask me questions about the Red Sox and my interest in them.
"You a Red Sox fan?"
"Ahh-yuh"
I was not enthused about this particular conversation and I made little eye contact.
"You know a lot about the Red Sox?"
"Yep..."
"Alright..." Here, begins to formulate a random trivia question about the Red Sox that I am already aware will determine how he views me and all white 24 year old men who wear Red Sox hats into random antique stores forever.
He begins... "Who was the hitting coach for the 2004 World Series Champion Red Sox team?"
Now, like I said, I am no bandwagoner. I have loved the Red Sox for a long time. I can tell you the THIRD BASE COACH from that team, the songs that played during the post-game celebration after game four of that team's championship and several other completely inconsequential facts about them. However, for some reason, I did not know who the hitting coach for the 2004 Red Sox was.
"Dave Magadan?" I say.
"Nope, he's the hitting coach now."
"Ah. Crap. I forget."
"I'll give you a hint. His nickname was Papa Jack."
"Uhhh... Still don't know. I'm drawing a blank."
"Ron Jackson."
"Ohh, yeah, sounds familiar." It did sound familiar.
"Alright, who played first base for that team?"
"Doug Mientkewicz and Kevin Millar."
"Second base."
"Pokey Reese and Mark Bellhorn."
"Shortstop."
"Orlando Cabrera"
"Third base."
"Ugh, Bill Muller."
"Alright, alright. Have you ever seen a 2004 World Series ring."
By this time I am pretty annoyed and, again, not paying him much eye contact. "I've seen pictures, of course. I've never seen one in person."
Around this time I turn over towards him. He is holding his hand out and reaching to it with his other hand to remove his ring, a 2004 World Series championship ring.
The ring itself is valued in jewels alone at well over $20,000. The historical significance of THIS Red Sox team and what it means to people like myself make it virtually priceless.
He hands it to me.
I read the name. Ron Jackson.

Just to recap: This man approached me to ask me questions about himself. In an antique store. In Decatur, Georgia. Wow.

I, of course, apologize profusely for not knowing him. Once I stopped being a douche and started taking a better look at him, he looked extremely familiar and if one had asked me what role Ron Jackson had on the 2004 Boston Red Sox, I would have surely answered "hitting coach." Unfortunately for me, that is not how the initial question was phrased.
Fortunately for me, Ron Jackson is an exceptionally nice man. He shook my hand and talked baseball with me for awhile. At one point I went off to the other side of the building to call my father who suggested I take a picture. My phone however is a piece of crap without a camera on it so I was seemingly S.O.L. Luckily, there was a Big Lots store in this bizarro shopping center so I was able to run over and grab a disposable camera for $3 and get back in time to catch Jackson before he left. He was more than willing to pose with me and he again handed me the ring so that I would get to hold it in the picture. Unfortunately I have to take 25 more pictures before I can get this developed and share it with you all, but I could not wait to tell the story.
Jackson went on to tell me a lot of funny anecdotes about the Sox. He works in the Astros organization but definitely knows his legacy was with that team. He talked about his friendship with David Ortiz and offered some very interesting insights to various Red Sox happenings. We talked for quite awhile. One especially interesting part was his story about Kevin Youkilis.
Youkilis is known for his incredible plate discipline but he was never known as a good hitter until he met Jackson. Jackson demonstrated how Youkilis USED to hold his bat and then how he holds his bat now and how it was based on his suggestion. Youkilis has one of the most unique and recognizable swings in baseball and is now a notorious power hitter and MVP candidate. At some point during this part of the conversation I literally looked around as though I was on candid camera. "Is this really happening?"

Looking back at this strange and awesome meeting, it seems even more bizarre. I mean it would be pretty unusual to run into a Braves player or manager or something in this city, let alone an integral part of one of the greatest Red Sox teams ever. He lives in Fayetteville now and was in the area visiting family. For what it's worth, he was very interested in my life and who I was and asked me almost as much as I asked him. Although it is a little unusual to solicit such attention, I cannot sing his praises enough.

If you've seen the title of this blog posting, you may have noticed that I said "celebrities" which is plural. Ron Jackson is not the only minor celebrity I have met this week. The other was a little bit more orchestrated.

John Hodgman had a book signing at my local Barnes and Noble store. You may know him as the PC in the Apple Mac vs. PC commercials. He is also frequently hilariously featured on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart and has now written two great books. This book tour was to promote "More Information Than You Require," his latest book which came out in late October. I would have been perfectly content if he had just answered questions and then signed books but he actually spoke for 90 minutes and was utterly hilarious. He told of how he came to become a "famous minor television personality" and was very willing to make fun of any and all audience members. He is unbelievably clever and all in all it was a great pleasure to meet him.
He had made a cameo appearance on the first season of Flight Of The Conchords so I had him sign my Conchords DVD cover. He crossed off the word "Conchords" and wrote "Hodgman."
This followed in a pattern as he crossed off his name on the title page of the book and then signed it beneath. I am a big fan of this type of humor and now a big fan of Mr. Hodgman. Also, having now delved into his book, I have to say it is definitely worth a look-see.

Anyways, I'm gonna wrap this up finally. I saw Kung Fu Panda yesterday so I'm gonna put that in the list:
18. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
17. Charlie Bartlett
16. Definitely, Maybe
15. Incredible Hulk, The
14. Semi-Pro
13. You Don't Mess With The Zohan
12. Step Brothers
11. Horton Hears A Who
10. Pineapple Express
9. Kung Fu Panda
8. Role Models
7. Get Smart
6. Burn After Reading
5. Iron Man
4. Changeling
3. My Blueberry Nights
2. Dark Knight, The
1. WALL-E

Rethinking 2008 Movies

I've been rethinking my 2008 movie ranking list. I think I should make it a point to see every legitimate movie of the year. And by year I mean in terms of the Academy Awards as technically There Will Be Blood would count as a 2008 movie. Thus, I think I am obligated to see all of the top 20+ grossing movies, even if Sex And The City or High School Musical III are among them.
Also, I think 2009 will be more along the lines of me blogging about each movie as I see them and then ranking them accordingly. Perhaps a different blog just for that. I have several blog ideas rolling lately and I am just ambitious enough to take them on.
Anyways, I saw another movie tonight and I have two more lined up for tomorrow if I am lucky so here you go:

17. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
16. Charlie Bartlett
15. Definitely, Maybe
14. Incredible Hulk, The
13. Semi-Pro
12. You Don't Mess With The Zohan
11. Step Brothers
10. Horton Hears A Who
9. Pineapple Express
8. Role Models
7. Get Smart
6. Burn After Reading
5. Iron Man
4. Changeling
3. My Blueberry Nights
2. Dark Knight, The
1. WALL-E

Impressive ranking for Changeling. I think it's a tough call to put it where I did. Movies 5 through 13 are all FUN movies and it's hard to say I would necessarily watch Changeling more times than Iron Man or Burn After Reading. I feel as though I have to keep Iron Man pretty high but Changeling is just too good. Angelina Jolie, who I generally don't care for, was just about perfect. The acting was amazing. The direction was imperfect but still good on Clint Eastwood's part. The story was of course excellent. All in all a great movie. Iron Man and Burn After Reading are no doubt among my favorites for the year so it's hard for me to put a movie like this that I maybe have less of an attachment to ahead of them, but for now that's where it is. I may make changes later on, something I have been discussing all along.

As of right now, the top eight movies on the list are buy-able and the rest is not. While this number may seem a bit high, I would argue that I have generally seen some of the more critically acclaimed or important movies of 2008 thus far, thereby increasing the likelihood of a movie being buy-able. When I start seeing the aforementioned S&TS or HSM3, I think it will change.

On tomorrow's slate: Zach & Miri Make A Porno & Quantum Of Solace.

Last but not least, I revamped the sidebar to your right. I renamed a lot of the sections and broke the link lists in to more organized sections. I am quite confident that this will serve me personally much better than it will serve anyone else as I have no clue what you could possibly want from my links.

Updating The List

Working on starting a second blog. Details to come. In the meantime, here's the updated 2008 movie list. I am forgetting some for sure.

16. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
15. Charlie Bartlett
14. Definitely, Maybe
13. Incredible Hulk, The
12. Semi-Pro
11. You Don't Mess With The Zohan
10. Step Brothers
9. Horton Hears A Who
8. Pineapple Express
7. Role Models
6. Get Smart
5. Burn After Reading
4. Iron Man
3. My Blueberry Nights
2. Dark Knight, The
1. WALL-E

Looking forward to seeing: Kung Fu Panda, Changeling, Zach & Miri Make A Porno, Bolt, Sex Drive, Hellboy II, Tropic Thunder
Not liking what I hear about: Quantum of Solace
Most exciting movie release for me, possibly ever: The Road
Second most exciting in the (very) near future: Bolt
Probably wont get around to seeing: Sex & The City, Voyage To The Center Of The Earth, most chick flicks, most horror flicks, Yes Man, Hancock, Mamma Mia, The Mummy

Also, I still think oscar season will produce the best movie of the year, but I'm content with it being Wall-E which comes out on DVD today.

Guess Who's Back, Back Again, Shady's Back, Tell A Friend

I have a new favorite song of all time.

T.I. & Rihanna - Live Your Life

Hip Hop + Numa Numa = Full integration between the races.

The lyrics, without further ado:

You're gonna be a shining star, in fancy clothes, and fancy car-ars.
And then you'll see, you're gonna go foward,
Cause everyone knows, just who you are-are.
So live your life, ay ay ay.
Your steady chasing that paper,
Just live your life (Oh!), ay ay ay.
You got no time for no hata's
Just live your life (Oh!), ay ay ay.
No telling where it'll take ya,
Just live your life (Oh!), ay ay ay.
Cause I'm a paper chaser,
Just living my life (Ay!), my life (Oh!), my life (Ay!), my life(Oh!),
just living my life (Ay!), my life (Oh!), my life (Ay!), my life(Oh!),
just living my life
Nevermind what haters say, ignore them 'til they fade away.
Amazing they ungreatful after all the game I gave away.
Safe to say I paved the way, for you cats to get paid today.
You still be wasting days away, now had I never saved the day.
Consider them my projay, how much I think they should pay.
Instead of being gracious, they violated and made you wait.
I never been a hater still I love them, in a crazy way.
Some say they so yay and know they couldn't even work on Labor day.
It aint that they black or white, their hands of area in shades of grey.
I'm West side anyway, even if I left the game and stayed away.
Some move away to make a way not move away cause they afraid.
I give back to the hood and all you ever did was take away.
I pray for patience but they make me want to melt they face away.
Like I once made them scream, now I could make them plead their case away.
Been thuggin' all my life, can't say I don't deserve to take a break.
You rather see me catch a case, and watch my future fade away.
(Rihanna):You're gonna be a shining star, in fancy clothes, and fancy car-ars.
And then you'll see, you're gonna go forward,
Cause everyone knows, just who you are-are.
So live your life, ay ay ay.
Your steady chasing that paper,
Just live your life (Oh!), ay ay ay.
You got no time for no hata's
Just live your life (Oh!), ay ay ay.
No telling where it'll take ya,
Just live your life (Oh!), ay ay ay.
Cause I'm a paper chaser,
Just living my life
(T.I.):I'm the opposite of moderate, immaculately polished
With the spirit of a hustler and the swagger of a college kid.
Allergic to the counterfeit, impartial to the politics.
Articulate but still would grab a nigga by the collar quick.
Whoever having problems wit, they record sales just holla Tip
If that don't work and all else fails, then turn around and follow Tip
I got love for the game but ay, I'm not in love with all of it.
I do without the fame and the rappers nowadays are comedy.
The hootin' and the hollerin', back and forth with the argueing.
Where you from, who you know, what you make and what kind of car you in.
Seems as though you lost sight of whats important with the positive.
And checks until your bank account, and you're about poverted.
Your values is a disarrayed, prioritized are horribly.
Unhappy with the riches cause you piss poor morraly.
Ignoring all prior advice and fore warning.
And we mighty full of ourselves all of a sudden, aren't we?
(Rihanna):You're gonna be a shining star, in fancy clothes, and fancy car-ars.
And then you'll see, you're gonna go far,
Cause everyone knows, just who you are-are.
So live your life, ay ay ay.
You steady chasing that paper,
Just live your life (Oh!), ay ay ay.
You got no time for no hata's
Just live your life (Oh!), ay ay ay.
No telling where it'll take ya,
Just live your life (Oh!), ay ay ay.
Cause I'm a paper chaser,
Just living my life (Ay!), my life (Oh!), my life (Ay!), my life(Oh!),
just living my life (Ay!), my life (Oh!), my life (Ay!), my life(Oh!),
So live your life
Got everbody watching what I docome walk in my shoes
and see the way Im livin if you really want to
got my mind on my moneyand Im not goin awaaay
So keep on getting ya paper and keep on climbing
looking in the mirror and keep on shining
till the game ends till the clock stop
we gonna post up on the top spot
living the life, the life
brand new city got my whole team with me
the life, my life
I do what I wanna do
Im living my life, my life
I will neva lose
Im living my life, my life
and Im not stopping

You're So Vain, I Bet You Think This Blog Is About You

Forgot that I saw Step Brothers awhile back. Tyler got a job in a movie theatre. This should help me see more 2008 movies as they come out. I really need to find a dollar theatre or something. I was doing a good job for awhile keeping up with newer movies... now I'm just waiting on certain movies to come out.
All things considered, I have no excuse for missing Burn After Reading. Maybe I'll go this weekend with Patricia. Hmm...

13. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
12. Charlie Bartlett
11. Definitely, Maybe
10. Incredible Hulk, The
9. Semi-Pro
8. Step Brothers
7. Horton Hears A Who
6. Pineapple Express
5. Get Smart
4. Iron Man
3. My Blueberry Nights
2. Dark Knight, The
1. WALL-E

Crazy Month: Office, VPILF, Fantasy and, oh yeah, Love

This has been a crazy month.
The gallon challenge video has been put on hold indefinitely but there will be photos posted here before too long.
Third, my fantasy football team (1-1) is terrible and I'm losing interest fast. Of course if I'm 5-2 through 7 weeks my tune will change. Oddly, I have arguably the best running back in the game and I'm still disappointed. Go figure.
I have decided to watch all of the Marx Brothers movies in chronological order (I own 12 of the 13) and this was a fantastic decision. As I shared a few posts back, the Marx Brothers, particularly Groucho, are unbelivably brilliant and hilarious.
The Red Sox are probably, knock on wood, going to the playoffs. We have a 6 1/2 game lead in the wild card and are only a 1 1/2 games out of the division lead. We were tied for the division lead the other day before losing twice. I really, really, really hope we win the division. In other news, the Yankees' elimination number is 3, meaning they're almost gone.
I just finished up my DVDs of The Office Season 4, which is wonderful, and the new season is less than a week away. I'll probably be blogging on that when it gets rolling. I bought a book called "The Office And Philosophy" by the people who do the "Pop Culture and Philosophy" series which I enjoy. It's basically a collection of philosophical essays with an Office touch. I'm dying to tear into it but I spend way too much time online working on mix CDs and talking to Patricia.
Sarah Palin: VPILF. It's nice to be able to vote with my junk. It was the only decision in life I wasn't already making with my junk.
So yeah, there will be a lot more to talk about now. I won't have such a hiatus again, I hope. Post some comments, fools, and feel free to ask questions or make suggestions for lists. I never get list suggestions. I'm thinking about posting mix CD tracklists. Hmm.

Bo Diddley, Bo Diddley, Have You Heard?

So I've got a big recommendation for this Thursday afternoon. If you haven't already listened to it, that is. Check out "Girl Talk." Girl Talk is a guy who does remixes or mashups of popular songs, mostly hip-hop based, with "classic" hits. Classic is a word I use very loosely as some of the sample material is awful but he turns all of it into a wonderful album-long song that would fit in nicely at a club. Not a shitty club though. One of my favorite interchanges is the blend between Sinead O'Connor's "Nothing Compares 2 U" and T.I.'s "What You Know About That." It's hard to believe these things would mesh, but they do and it's awesome. Even more surprising is that Girl Talk isn't facing hundreds of lawsuits because he puts this stuff out on CDs available most places and has done so for years, clearly without the original artists' permission. My only guess is that because he uses relatively small snippets of the source material he escapes legal requirements. That or he pays a lot of money for the rights.

I guess this can serve as a Vinyl Find of the Week post, too. This week I'll go with Bo Diddley's debut self-titled album "Bo Diddley." This was found along with the Chuck Willis album from like 2-3 weeks ago in a Marietta antique store. It's worth $250 and unfortunately has its former owner's signature across the top. No matter, it's in great shape and is one of the great early rock & roll albums ever made. It also makes me laugh. The first (and biggest) single off of this album was a song called "Bo Diddley." So if you're keeping up, that means "Bo Diddley" by Bo Diddley was on Bo Diddley. That is, the song by the artist was on the album. I love it. This is one of three Bo Diddley albums I'll have on here eventually. His early stuff is pretty valuable and I've inexplicably turned up three different records in this category.

Hmm, what else is going on? I've been reading a Chuck Klosterman book lately for the first time. I'll probably write more about it when I've read enough to adequately comment. I'm excited because one of my favorite books "The Road" by Cormac McCarthy (2006 Pulitzer Prize winning book) will be in theatres by the end of the year, sure to make an Oscar run like its predecessor, No Country For Old Men. Viggo Mortenson plays the lead and photos have leaked online. Very, very exciting.

Work has been insane lately. I've added "photographer" to my resume as I've been taking pictures for the South Fulton paper I write for. More work without more pay is never welcomed, but I like having control over the pictures and I am surprisingly good with the camera. The Vince Dooley photo(s) from last week's paper were mine and from now on most of the South Fulton photos will be mine as well.

I've got to try and see some more 2008 movies to blog about. I've really enjoyed keeping a running list of the movies I've seen this year and ranking them but it's so wildly (and unnecessarily) incomplete that I feel bad. I think I'll be checking out Tropic Thunder and Mamma Mia some time in the near future. The concepts behind each movie seem terrible, especially the morally repulsive Mamma Mia, but I'll do my best to put my biases aside.

Anyways, that's all I've got today. I think I'll start sharing more links in the near future to spice things up around here. Use the comments things below, even if there's nothing to say. Later!

Vince Dooley's Tears Cure Cancer

Another cool opportunity to hang out with a cool famous person at work. This time it's former UGA coach, college football hall of famer, national champion, Vince Dooley. Coach Dooley is the man. It wasn't the first time I'd met him, but it was the first time I had the chance to get a photo with him and actually have a sit down conversation with him. Tomorrow I'll post the link to the article. If you want to see the rest of the photos from the event, click on the "Picasa" link on the right and go to "Work Photos."
Coach Dooley was pretty cool to hang out with. A lot of my friends had had the pleasure of his company more than I had in college, but after I graduated I joined a Men's Bible Study church group thing of about 20 guys. One of them was Coach Dooley. Other "famous" people include Mark Richt's father and 2 of David Perno's brothers. This in addition to several affluent Athens businessmen. Moving to Atlanta killed my involvement, but still, it was awesome.
Should be a pretty fantastic sports week this week. College football starts, high school football starts (work, ugh), and most importantly: Red Sox vs Yankees, final series in Yankee Stadium. Big series for the Sox.
My friend Jarrod from Vidalia is in town this week which is nice. He's here for some sort of training thing. His company is much welcomed and he's considering moving up here apparently. God knows I need more friends in this city. We were hanging out at Octane last night, my favorite coffee place in Atlanta. It was a very good time.
Not much to talk about again today. I've been thinking about discussing my love life but I don't really want this blog to become that sort of sappy idiotic ramblings page. Any suggestions for a list of the week this week?

A Little Toothpaste On A Monday Afternoon

Just a little ToothpasteForDinner to get the week rolling. Not a whole lot worth talking about. The Red Sox are surviving, Georgia football is set to start and we had our big fantasy draft. It went pretty well. With the 3rd overall pick I scored the 2nd best running back in the game as well as the best receiving corps in the league. Gotta be happy about that. My team looks something like this:

QB: Marc Bulger, David Garrard

RB: Adrian Peterson, Edgerrin James, Matt Forte, Rashard Mendenhall

WR: Braylon Edwards, Andre Johnson, Santonio Holmes, Bernard Berrian, Reggie Williams

TE: Todd Heap, Randy McMichael

K: Nick Folk

DEF: Seattle Seahawks, Philadelphia Eagles

That's all I got for now. Got 2 more drafts coming up as well as a possible second league of my own if I get enough interest.

Come On! Feel The Georgianoise!

Some exciting news today. Through the Sufjan Stevens rumor mill we have come to the conclusion that his next "State" album will be about a state whose first letter would be enough to determine which state it is. Thus, we can conclude that the state's first letter is not shared with any other states which leaves eight possible states:

Delaware

Florida
Georgia (!!!!)
Hawaii
Louisiana
Pennsylvania
Rhode Island
Utah

My money's on Pennsylvania or Utah with Rhode Island being a possibility just because the name is so easy to turn into an album title for him. For those unfamiliar, Sufjan Stevens is probably the best musician to come out in the past ten years and it's been at least 3 years since he's put out a completely new album (there have been Christmas and Outtakes releases since then, but not real albums). He has thusfar done "Come On Feel The Illinoise!" and a Michigan album.

In other news, the fantasy football season is upon us which for me is significantly more interesting than the actual NFL season and even the average college football season. Technically this college football season is more interesting than the average one because of UGA's projected success but fantasy football is one of the most wonderful things in the world. People will be coming to my apartment Saturday evening for our draft. Nearly all of my closest friends are involved in my primary league this year which is really fun for me. It dawned on me recently that a lot of the people in the league don't know each other but everyone knows at least 2 other people so it should work. Two years ago I won the league and last year I came in third so it's been a good run thusfar for me in this game. The baseball league I'm in with Rob & B.J. is going especially well. I am in 2nd place with the playoffs right around the corner and I am playing the first place team and kicking his ass so far. A win could put me in first which I could possibly hold on to going into the playoffs. Not bad considering I was in 4th less than a month ago. I have an unhealthy interest in fantasy sports. Meanwhile, Rob is saying this fantasy football season will be his final due to waning interest. I cannot even fathom this. I can understand people not being into it to begin with, but I can't see someone being completely into it and then dropping it. Oh well. He'll be back.

Now for everyone's least favorite weekly blog feature: vinyl find of the week! This week is Gene Chandler - The Duke Of Earl. This is easily one of my five greatest record finds ever. I paid $3 for it, thinking it was perhaps a Duke Ellington record or just something random that might be interesting to check out. When I got home with my record finds that day, I began to look them all up. I was very disappointed that I had spent way more than I should've and came home with only 1-2 decent records. I couldn't find the record in question in the price guide thingy because it didn't have an artist's name listed in any of the common areas. A few weeks later I looked again. In the blurb of text on the back it had mentioned something about Gene Chandler. I knew Gene Chandler had written the original Duke Of Earl song but I had thought this record was someone else singing that song or something like that. I was wrong. Turns out this is the original Gene Chandler record. Then it got better. The standard issue of the Gene Chandler record was worth about $200, which is the value they generally give for older records featuring black artists and extremely popular songs from the time period. For instance, most of Chuck Berry's original records are worth $200. But this one had something a little different. The word "Stereophonic" is on the top of the cover. This meant that the record is "stereo" as opposed to "mono." This is significant in that it was released in 1961 but in 1961 there were very few stereo record players. Not until the Beatles came along were people like "holy crap I must listen to this in two speakers!" So basically, with no one having stereo record players, no one was yet buying stereo records. Especially stereo records of black artists. This turns a $200 record into an $800 record. That's right, book value $800. But it gets even better. Unlike all of the other high end records I own, this effing record is SEALED. Sealed records carry a value higher than anything else. This one has stayed sealed for 47 years. I could likely sell this one for it's book value or more if I found the right buyer. Wow. Not bad for $3.

Just to put this in perspective, I only own 5 records worth more than this and one worth the same. Of those 6, only one is not a Beatles record. None of the others are sealed. Woot.

R.I.P. Leroi Moore

This saddens me to no end.

I'll Make Up A New God And Have A Funky Tea Party Of My Own

Just a few cool things to share today...
Three new cool gizmos for the blog's sidebar which will serve as the lists of the week...

Photos of the 20 or so drawings of jazz musicians I've done:



Photos of the posters or DVD covers from the top 25 greatest movie list from 2 weeks ago:



photos of the 20 albums everyone must own in order to be taken seriously when discussing music with me (aka my 20 greatest album list)



Hopefully tomorrow or the next day I will have photos from the awesome day at work I had today. I got to re-meet someone famous! Woo! With pictures! Wowza! Anyways, that's all I've got. I'm not particularly inspired lately when it comes to the blog.

It's Great To Be A Georgia Bulldog

It is great to be a Georgia Bulldog in August of 2008. Only a few weeks 'til kickoff and we are the best team in the country. An undefeated makes us one of the greatest college football teams of all time. We have the best running back in the country and one of the better quarterbacks. I can't freaking wait. With this in mind we have the list of the week... My 13 favorite pro or college sports franchises - ranked.
1. Boston Red Sox
2. Duke Blue Devils Basketball
3. University Of Georgia Football
4. University Of Georgia Basketball
5. Jeff Gordon (Hendrick Motorsports)
6. Boston Celtics
7. Denver Nuggets
8. Houston Rockets
9. Atlanta Hawks
10. Atlanta Thrashers
11. Atlanta Braves
12. Kansas Jayhawks Basketball
13. Tiger Woods

Eventually I think I might make a list where I ranke how I feel about every team in a sport or league from top to bottom. It's good for the sake of reminding me I hate a team when I subconsciously join their bandwagon.
Also, Kansas basketball is only on the list because of their Final Four victory over UNC, one of the best moments of my year so far.

I Could Dance With You Until The Cows Come Home. On Second Thought, I'd Rather Dance With The Cows Till You Come Home

It's Vinyl Find Of The Week day. At left we have Chuck Willis - The King Of The Stroll. This record is worth about $300 and is in excellent shape. Willis died pretty young so we aren't overly familiar with his work but apparently he was very popular as an early rock/R&B musician. The photo doesn't do it justice but it's a really good looking album, as most Atlantic releases from that time were. I believe I paid something like $5 to $8 for this, so it was a steal at a Marietta Square antique store that normally overcharges for everything they have. Generally speaking I don't pay more than $3 apiece for records unless it's something special and this clearly is something special, especially considering the condition it was/is in. I will probably put this one up on my wall when I finally get to working on my room in that way. I don't have a whole lot else to talk about today so here's a bunch of quotes from the movie "Duck Soup" by the Marx Brothers. As you will see, it is one of the funniest movies ever made and you don't have to watch the movies to appreciate the quotes. A lot of my blog entry titles are some of Groucho's incredible witticisms.

Rufus T. Firefly: I'll see you at the opera tonight. I'll hold your seat till you get there. After you get there you're on your own.
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Rufus T. Firefly: Awfully decent of you to drop in today. Do you realize our army is facing disastrous defeat? What do you intend to do about it? Chicolini: I've done it already. Rufus T. Firefly: You've done what? Chicolini: I've changed to the other side. Rufus T. Firefly: So you're on the other side, eh? Well, what are you doing over here? Chicolini: Well, the food is better over here.
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Rufus T. Firefly: Lieutenant, why weren't the original indictment papers placed in my portfolio? Bob Roland: Why, uh, I didn't think those papers were important at this time, your excellency. Rufus T. Firefly: You didn't think they were important? Do you realize I had my dessert wrapped in those papers?
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Bob Roland: Ambassador Trentino is a very sensitive man. Perhaps if you insult him. He's very easy to insult. Why, I said something to Vera Marcal in his presence once, and he slapped my face. Rufus T. Firefly: Why didn't Vera slap your face? Bob Roland: She did. Rufus T. Firefly: What'd you say to her? [Roland whispers it in his ear. Firefly slaps his face] Rufus T. Firefly: You ought to be ashamed of yourself. Where'd you hear that story? Bob Roland: Why, you told it to me. Rufus T. Firefly: Oh yes, I remember. I should have slapped Mrs. Teasdale's face when she told it to me.
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Rufus T. Firefly: Now, what is it that has four pairs of pants, lives in Philadelphia, and it never rains but it pours? Chicolini: Atsa good one. I give you three guesses. Rufus T. Firefly: Now let me see. Has four pair of pants, lives in Philadelphia... Is it male or female? Chicolini: No, I no think so. Rufus T. Firefly: Is he dead? Chicolini: Who? Rufus T. Firefly: I don't know. I give up. Chicolini: I give up, too.
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Rufus T. Firefly: How would you like a job in the mint? Chicolini: Mint? No, no, I no like a mint. Uh - what other flavor you got?
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Rufus T. Firefly: You're a brave man. Go and break through the lines. And remember, while you're out there risking your life and limb through shot and shell, we'll be in be in here thinking what a sucker you are.
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Rufus T. Firefly: Dig trenches, with our men being killed off like flies? There isn't time to dig trenches. We'll have to buy them ready made. Here, run out and get some trenches. Wait a minute, get them this high [gestures to his chin] Rufus T. Firefly: and our soldiers won't need any pants. Wait a minute, get them this high [gestures over his head] Rufus T. Firefly: and we won't need any soldiers.
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Rufus T. Firefly: Gentlemen, Chicolini here may talk like an idiot, and look like an idiot, but don't let that fool you: he really is an idiot. I implore you, send him back to his father and brothers, who are waiting for him with open arms in the penitentiary. I suggest that we give him ten years in Leavenworth, or eleven years in Twelveworth. Chicolini: I'll tell you what I'll do: I'll take five and ten in Woolworth.
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Rufus T. Firefly: Married. I can see you right now in the kitchen, bending over a hot stove. But I can't see the stove.
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Rufus T. Firefly: Not that I care, but where is your husband? Mrs. Teasdale: Why, he's dead. Rufus T. Firefly: I bet he's just using that as an excuse. Mrs. Teasdale: I was with him to the very end. Rufus T. Firefly: No wonder he passed away. Mrs. Teasdale: I held him in my arms and kissed him. Rufus T. Firefly: Oh, I see, then it was murder. Will you marry me? Did he leave you any money? Answer the second question first.
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Rufus T. Firefly: Remember, you're fighting for this woman's honour, which is probably more than she ever did.
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Rufus T. Firefly: Maybe you can suggest something. As a matter of fact, you do suggest something. To me you suggest a baboon. Ambassador Trentino: What? Rufus T. Firefly: I, uh, I'm sorry I said that; it isn't fair to the rest of the baboons.
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Chicolini: Now I aska you one. What has a trunk, but no key, weighs 2,000 pounds and lives in a circus? Prosecutor: That's irrelevant. Chicolini: Irrelephant? Hey, that'sa the answer. There's a whole lot of irrelephants in the circus.
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Rufus T. Firefly: Oh, I'm sick of messages from the front. Don't we ever get a message from the side? - What is it? Bob Roland: General Smith reports a gas attack. He wants to know what to do. Rufus T. Firefly: Tell him to take a teaspoonful of bicarbonate of soda and a half a glass of water.
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Rufus T. Firefly: Well, that covers a lot of ground. Say, you cover a lot of ground yourself. You better beat it - I hear they're going to tear you down and put up an office building where you're standing. You can leave in a taxi. If you can't get a taxi, you can leave in a huff. If that's too soon, you can leave in a minute and a huff. You know, you haven't stopped talking since I came here? You must have been vaccinated with a phonograph needle.
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Minister of Finance: Here is the Treasury Department's report, sir. I hope you'll find it clear. Rufus T. Firefly: Clear? Huh. Why a four-year-old child could understand this report. [to Bob Roland] Rufus T. Firefly: Run out and find me a four-year-old child, I can't make head or tail of it.
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Rufus T. Firefly: [to Chicolini] I wanted to get a writ of habeas corpus, but I should have gotten a-rid of you instead.
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Prosecutor: Chicolini, you are charged with high treason, and if found guilty, you will be shot. Chicolini: I object. Prosecutor: You object? On what grounds? Chicolini: I couldn't think of anything else to say. Rufus T. Firefly: Objection sustained. Prosecutor: Your majesty, you sustain the objection? Rufus T. Firefly: Sure, I couldn't think of anything else to say either. Why don't you object?
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Rufus T. Firefly: I'll see my lawyer about this as soon as he graduates from law school.
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Rufus T. Firefly: And now, members of the cabinet... Rufus T. Firefly: we'll take up old business. Cabinet Member: I wish to discuss the tariff. Rufus T. Firefly: Sit down, that's new business. No old business? Very well... [pounds gavel] Rufus T. Firefly: we'll take up new business. Cabinet Member: Now, about that tariff... Rufus T. Firefly: Too late, that's old business already. Sit down.
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Cabinet Member: The Department of Labor wishes to note that the workers of Freedonia are demanding shorter hours. Rufus T. Firefly: Very well, we'll give them shorter hours. We'll start by cutting their lunch hour to 20 minutes.
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Mrs. Teasdale: Notables from every country are gathered here in your honor. This is a gala day for you. Rufus T. Firefly: Well, a gal a day is enough for me. I don't think I could handle any more.
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Mrs. Teasdale: As chairman of the reception committee, I welcome you with open arms. Rufus T. Firefly: Is that so? How late do you stay open?
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Rufus T. Firefly: Just for that, you don't get the job I was going to give you. Chicolini: What job? Rufus T. Firefly: Secretary of War. Chicolini: All right, I take it. Rufus T. Firefly: Sold.
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Mrs. Teasdale: Your excellency, the ambassador's here on a friendly visit. He's had a change of heart. Rufus T. Firefly: A lot of good that'll do him: he's still got the same face. Ambassador Trentino: I'm sorry we lost our tempers; I'm willing to forgot if you are. Rufus T. Firefly: Forget? You ask me to forget? A Firefly never forgets. Why, my ancestors would rise from their graves, and I'd only have to bury them again.
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Prosecutor: Something must be done! War would mean a prohibitive increase in our taxes. Chicolini: Hey, I got an uncle lives in Taxes. Prosecutor: No, I'm talking about taxes - money, dollars! Chicolini: Dollars! There's-a where my uncle lives! Dollars, Taxes!
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Rufus T. Firefly: [into radio] This is Rufus T. Firefly coming to you through the courtesy of the enemy. We're in a mess folks, we're in a mess. Rush to Freedonia! Three men and one woman are trapped in a building! Send help at once! If you can't send help, send two more women! [Pinky enters and raises three fingers] Rufus T. Firefly: Make that three more women!
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[reporting on shadowing Firefly] Chicolini: Monday we watch-a Firefly's house, but he no come he wasn't home. Tuesday we go to the ball game, but he fool us: he no show up. Wednesday HE go to the ball game, but we fool HIM, WE no show up. Thursday it was a double-header nobody show up. Friday it rained all day, there was no ball game, so we stayed home, we listen to it over the radio.
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Rufus T. Firefly: I'm in a hurry! To the House of Representatives! Ride like fury! If you run out of gas, get ethyl. If Ethel runs out, get Mabel! Now step on it!
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Ambassador Trentino: Have you been trailing Firefly? Chicolini: Have we been trailing Firefly? Why, my partner, he's got a nose just like a bloodhound. Ambassador Trentino: Oh really? Chicolini: Yeah, and the rest of his face don't look so good either.
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Rufus T. Firefly: Go, and never darken my towels again!
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Rufus T. Firefly: Here are the plans of war. They're as valuable as your life. And that's putting them pretty cheap. Watch them like a cat watched her kittens. Have you ever had kittens? No, of course not, you're too busy running around playing bridge. Can't you see what I'm trying to tell you, I love you.
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Rufus T. Firefly: Take a letter. Bob Roland: Who to? Rufus T. Firefly: To my dentist. [Roland writes out the following] Rufus T. Firefly: Uh... Dear dentist, enclosed find check for $500, yours very truly. Send that off immediately. Bob Roland: I'll, um, I'll have to enclose a check first. Rufus T. Firefly: You do and I'll fire you.
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Mrs. Teasdale: Oh, your Excellency! Rufus T. Firefly: You're not so bad yourself.

A Child Of Five Would Understand This. Someone Fetch A Child Of Five.

Well, I did it. I attempted the Gallon Challenge. It was an interesting experience. Of course I did not succeed in the typical sense. I did exceed some expectations. I took down a ton of milk. I didn't instantly throw up (I had to force myself to throw up). Theres are a lot of glorious details to come when we finish editing the video. Right near the end I was disappointed in my performance then I took down a huge glass of milk and it didn't make vomit (as time expired). I couldve handled a little more before my body started its evacuation plan. A few things to whet your appetite: the video won't be too gross (we didn't record most of the grosser parts, but believe me you'll get the idea), the video will be pretty funny, I thoroughly enjoyed the experience and could possibly be talked into trying it again. Get excited. No, I don't currently know exactly when it'll be posted.
In other news, after attempting the gallon challenge, we went to see Pineapple Express. This movie was very, very interesting. While walking out of the theater I called it "the best bad movie I've ever seen" and I stand by this statement. It was completely and utterly hilarious. The script was fantastic and there weren't any gaping plot holes. The direction and/or editing were beyond bad, though. I feel like the movie was supposed to exist in a different world than it did. The director went through great lengths to show the world in which these events took place was our own and then constantly had things happen that defied logic. If we're playing by the rules of our world, you can't have events that would make a normal person scratch their head in disbelief passed along as no big deal. This happened the entire movie, whether it was Seth Rogan's relationship with the high school chick, the high school chick's parents' weird attitudes about everything that happens, or everyone in the entire movie never questioning the legality of having weed (including the non-corrupt cops), crazy things happen throughout the entire movie and not too many people acknowledge these things are crazy. Also, the casting director clearly had a better sense of humor than the director. Rosie Perez? Seriously? It would be funny to put Rosie Perez in a movie like this if they wanted to make it funny, but they just had her playing it straight and it took away from things for me. She was awful, as was just about everyone except the two stars. So, in lieu of a solid movie, we have the jokes. The jokes do not disappoint. They pour them on at a great pace that doesn't really let up no matter what bizarre event is going on. This is why everyone and their mother will tell you to go see this movie. It's completely hilarious and most of the jokes are original. Maybe the audience enjoyed the stupid action/falls humor more than the clever humor, but the movie didn't lack in the clever department. All in all, I wasn't disappointed I went to see it. I didn't leave the theater all moist like my friends did, but I'd still recommend it.
It will probably end up being the best movie on the year I wouldn't buy. But who knows, maybe I'll be talked into it. It's certainly a good conversation-piece movie. Oh, and if you like Simon Pegg movies, I recommend this one for you especially.
Updated list of 2008 movies:

12. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
11. Charlie Bartlett
10. Definitely, Maybe
9. Incredible Hulk, The
8. Semi-Pro
7. Horton Hears A Who
6. Pineapple Express
5. Get Smart
4. Iron Man
3. My Blueberry Nights
2. Dark Knight, The
1. WALL-E

I Have A Mind To Join A Club And Beat You Over The Head With It

It should be a crazy busy day today. At work alone I have the following things to do:

• At least one interview for the Fulton paper
• Transcribe quotes for the Douglas and Fulton papers
• Call all four coaches in Douglas to finish up my football preview stories
• Transcribe the quotes from these conversations
• Write the football preview stories (4)
• Write features on one player from each team per aforementioned transcribed quotes (4)
• Write a blog entry for our new website
• Possibly write stories for Fulton
• Collapse

Tonight should be fun. It could be GALLON CHALLENGE day. It hasn't officially been decided that it's today, but personally I don't care anymore, haha, I'm not even going to prepare myself all that much except I'll probably avoid eating foods that will be grosser coming up than going down.

My Red Sox are close to getting Brian Giles for injury insurance. It's nice. It's also nice to see Jason Bay doing well while Manny could face a lifetime ban from baseball if they find out he mailed it in (see: collusion). Jason Bay getting love from his teammates makes me very, very happy.
I'm still unpacking at the new apartment. It's been extremely time consuming and tedious. Everything got jumbled by being in 2 different places and putting it all back together in nice new order is exhausting. I've been sorting through records, DVDs, books, magazines, newspapers and tons of random trinket-y things I've amassed over the years. The living room (home of the records, DVDs and lots of cool posters) looks great now. It took a long time but it finally came together. Now I'm working on my room. I have tons of shelf space which is something I've wanted for awhile. I think it's going to look chaotic, even when it's finished, but at this point the volume of crap I have makes it impossible for me to have a simple, sleek looking room.

Since the week's almost over and I haven't done one yet, here's the list of the week. This week it's "best looking female celebrities." They are in alphabetical order. I love them all (especially when no one's around).

• Ingrid Bergman
• Kate Bosworth
• Tina Fey
• Anne Hathaway
• Audrey Hepburn
• Norah Jones
• Grace Kelly
• Keira Knightley
• Rachel McAdams
• Dagmar Midcap
• Joanna Newsom
• Natalie Portman

Vinyl Find Of The Week, Etc.

Finally able to start my "Vinyl Find of the Week" gimmick. I have no idea why this would appeal to those of you who read me regularly, but this is the crap I care about and some of it is pretty interesting. To kick it off, I went with the record that is the blog's namesake: Buck Clayton - How Hi The Fi. I love the album, obviously. It's only worth $50 which is far less than most of the records that will be on here, but I think my price guide undervalues it. I saw one for sale at Wuxtry Records in Athens, GA for $40 which means it's price guide value should be quite a bit higher. Buck Clayton isn't the most famous jazz musician and I wouldn't call him prolific, but this one is about perfect if you like upbeat jazz. Since moving to Buckhead, I've had a much greater appreciation for my record collection than I've had in a long, long time. It is wonderfully on display in my new living room and there's something majestic about it the way we have it arranged. As I mentioned, a lot of the junkier records are getting sold off so that helps things as well. It's nice to have moments where you appreciate what you have more than what you want. I have these same moments with a lot of my various junk. My roommates agreed that they had never seen a guy with as much "stuff" as me. I can see this making sense, but I'm curious as to what it says about me. Most people seem to think it's a good thing, so I guess I shouldn't worry about it.
Ever since I posted the link to my blog on Facebook, I've been getting quite a few hits. Miraculously I didn't get any comments on my list of 25 favorite movies. I thought that one would garner some sort of discussion. A year or two ago I posted my favorite movies by decade on Facebook and got tons of comments. Oh well.
Work has been stressful lately. I've been doing all of my regular work on time but I've been struggling to get photos that accompany the stories I write that take place outside of Douglas County. I rely on the interviewed subjects to submit photos and they forget or whatever and I'll get phone calls from the powers that be wondering what happened. It makes me look bad and, lately, feel bad. The higher-ups scheduled a meeting at the same time of what might be my biggest local assignment ever (that is, I've recruited several people to show up somewhere to do something for a story and now I won't be there to ask them questions). It's technically not a HUGE problem, but didn't help anything. I've taken on a lot of extra work outside of my coverage area without asking any questions and all of the problems regarding it are probably making me look bad to the higher-ups rather than making me look good for doing thankless work without ever really being asked to do diddley. Oh well again.
On a lighter note, I'm still loving the Jason Bay/Manny Ramirez swap. We lost our first game since getting Bay last night but he still has a hit in every game he's been with us. Meanwhile the Yankees' big trade deadline pitching acquisition gave up a walk-off grand slam yesterday. Gotta love that. I haven't been worried about the Yankees all year, then, right after the All Star break they started catching up, then they almost swept us, then they were right on our heels, then they picked up lots of good players at the deadline, but suddenly I'm back to being comfortable with them. Their pickups weren't very good afterall, their pitching staff is falling apart like crazy, the guys who were having insane months are coming back to earth and they seem extremely beatable. Meanwhile, the Jason Bay Red Sox seem relaxed and relieved to be rid of Manny. I'll take it.

Jason Bay Is My Homeboy

Don't let the door hit you on the way out.

25 Favorite (Critically Acclaimed) Movies Of All Time

It's list of the week time, and here we have my 25 favorite movies of all time. I made this list as the Paul version of a film critic's list. In reality The Sandlot and Undercover Brother make my list, but this list is a little more official. There are definitely movies on this list that wouldn't be on others' lists, but they all have a certain degree of social significance greater than a baseball movie about a pwning some kids all summer over an autographed baseball, etc. Anyways, the order is alphabetical and this list took a very, very long time to compile. Thoughts and comments welcomed. Feel free to bitch about movies being left out, etc.

• Adventures Of Robin Hood, The
• American Beauty
• Brazil
• Breathless
• Cabinet Of Dr. Caligari, The
• Casablanca
• Charade
• Citizen Kane
• Double Indemnity
• Duck Soup
• For A Few Dollars More
• Godfather, The (and The Godfather II)
• Kind Hearts And Coronets
• M
• Metropolis
• Modern Times
• Monty Python's Life Of Brian
• Night Of The Hunter
• Nights Of Cabiria
• Notorious
• Raging Bull
• Third Man, The
• Two-Lane Blacktop
• Virgin Spring, The
• Yellow Submarine

In other news, the Gallon Challenge has been pushed back one week due to poor attendance and difficulty of finding a venue to do it. It turns out you can't have someone vomitting all over your living room. Who knew? The good news is we are having an open invitation to anyone who wants to come and because of the change we might get a few more people than we would've gotten tomorrow. Oddly enough, I was the only one pushing for it to be this Friday. Everyone else voted for it to be pushed back. Oh, well.

Last but not least, check out this hilarious site one of my coworkers sent me. Its authentic look makes it even better.

You get NOTHING! You lose! Good day sir!

Be sure and read the previous post, it's far more interesting than this one, I just thought of a few more things I wanted on the blog today that I forgot to bother with earlier.

1. I finally finished my list project. See the four links in the sidebar titled "what i have, what i want, etc." They took me forever and they are every list that will show up in the "List Of The Week" feature I've been doing.

2. I realized I've tried 31 Samuel Adams, not 30. I forgot Imperial Pilsner. It's pretty much pointless but for the sake of being comprehensive I mention it.

3. This is completely hilarious and true, courtesy of Pearls Before Swine:

Valdosta, Georgia: What A Joke

Last night, the goons at ESPN named Valdosta, GA as "TitleTown USA" based on a website poll in which Valdosta supposedly bested 19 other finalists with 30% of the vote. Just to give you an idea, that's more than New York, NY and Boston, MA got combined.

I write about sports for a living in an area where sports is not THAT big of a deal and you couldn't pay me enough to go to Valdosta to write about that crap. Their sole claim to fame is their arguably unparalleled success in high school football. I think we all have an attachment to high school football, but you mean to tell me THIRTY PERCENT of voters thought Valdosta's high school football accomplishments were better than that of the Yankees (26 World Series titles), Giants (defending champs) and Knicks? They thought Valdosta's high school accomplishments were better than the Red Sox (7 World Series titles, defending champs, currently most popular team in baseball), Celtics (17 NBA titles, defending champs), and Patriots (you know their resume)?!?! Bullshit. There is a zero percent chance this voting was done fairly. Zero. Not only should Valdosta not have won this thing, they shouldn't have come in the top 15 out of 20. It's preposterous. Let's just say the entire state of Georgia was voting for them (which is preposterous as well when you consider the entire state doesn't even agree to root for ANY of its pro sports teams), and let's say Valdosta pulled a lot of votes from Florida because it's on the border. Let's also assume they jacked some votes from people who found the special ESPN did on them particularly heartwarming. EVEN THEN they shouldn't have gone over 6% (which is what Boston got and MORE than what New York got).
Famous professional athletes to come out of Valdosta: J.D. Drew, Jesse Tuggle, and, uhh... Buck Belue? Huh?
I don't know why I let these things anger me. What could be less significant than this poll? I think it's got more to do with the fact that the city of Valdosta will probably take this as the compliment to end all compliments than the actual fact that they won. This designation would be forgotten at about 15 of the 20 finalist cities.

Okay, deep breath, and we're back.

I am officially an Atlantan now. That is, I live inside 285 which is the real Atlanta. My address now ends in "Atlanta, GA" and whatever my zip code is. I am excited. Besides the ridiculous cost of gas for me to drive to work each day, there is no major drawback. I am in the social center of the southern world and I couldn't be happier. Within a few miles of me is my favorite coffee shop, one of my favorite record stores, my favorite Church, some of my best friends, some excellent restaurants (I've already had Fellini's Pizza TWICE since moving 3 days ago) and just about anything one could think of needing. The only thing it's lacking is a killer video store. The only decent one is in the Highlands which, if I'm not mistaken, is far.

I am now reasonably close to the Venezias, Tyler, Kelly, BJ, Stephen and of course my roommates who have taken surprisingly well to boxes being in the common area and some of my space consuming stuff being in the living room. We all live in a Yellow Submarine. It should be a decent living situation as all 3 of us are laid back, we have enough common interests that would make us friends if we weren't living together and we all, apparently, like the Beatles. We've already developed a playful college football disagreement that should make for a very fun season. I feel like I have been unpacking non-stop for a few days and still have so much left to do it's scary. As for transitions to an apartment, this one has been very reasonable. We haven't had to deal with utilities, bugs or too many malfunctions. Some of the neighbors are scary but I suspect they just look that way. It's pretty unlikely that there would be genuinely threatening people living in this place.
I'm still trying to decide what I want this blog to be. I'm beginning to think it would be good to go back to writing the sort of tongue-in-cheek op/ed stuff I wrote in college but I'm also enjoying writing about the day-to-day crap. Plus I haven't figured out how my "____ of the week" gimmicks would fit in. Suggestions welcomed as are comments. I'm looking forward to "unveiling" my list website project if I can ever get it together. Unveiling in quotation marks due to it being a wayyy too important designation for this. Still, I've been looking for a site that will allow me to simply share a few different link rolls without getting too complicated. Del.icio.us should do it but they overcomplicate things. I'm seriously considering just using a stupid Geocities page, haha. At least I know what to expect from them.

I Was So Much Older Then, I'm Younger Than That Now

Tomorrow I move to Buckhead (click to enlarge the photo). The irony of someone such as myself moving to the yuppie capital of the (southern) world is prevalent. Still, I'm excited. I'll finally be "in the city" and I'll be near some of my favorite places and favorite people. Which is a pretty big upgrade over being near none of my favorite places and none of my favorite people, hah. Other positives include: getting a majority of my stuff out of storage, not being in Lithia Springs, cheaper rent (negated by more gas used, at least at first), far more interesting social life, far more interesting roommates (for better or worse), ease of tricking myself into believing it's okay for me to live a lifestyle very similar to that of a college student and there will probably be some financial gain to having my shit together as I intend to hijack my dad's eBay account in order to sell off a lot of stuff I no longer need. It's going to be extremely difficult to part with some stuff (and I may be skittish) but I really love going through old stuff and any money I make will go right back into my ridiculous hobbies.

Speaking of making money on my ridiculous hobbies, I went to my first ever record show last week and it occurred to me that I'm plenty qualified (and willing) to set up a booth at the next one they have which will be late September. I might be dillusional but I think I could make a lot of money en route to thinning my collection out (something I've been planning on doing for a long time).

I find myself listening to Rilo Kiley (left) a lot lately. It's sort of funny considering I'm a guy and this is empowering crap for women to listen to, probably especially lesbians, but there are some really good lyrics, some of which fit me pretty well right now. I think it's pretty ridiculous to say lyrics fit one's life, but I do it anyway. Someday I may walk the walk.

Does anyone have a digital camera they're interested in selling? I really need a cheap digital camera for the aforementioned projects and to make this blog better. It occurs to me I won't be able to afford a Best Buy one for another 3 weeks which sucks. Let me know.

T-minus one week to the GALLON CHALLENGE. I'd tell you to get excited but I know you already are. I'm trying to think of the best way to practice for this. I've been drinking a little milk here and there but I don't think anything short of a trial run will help anything. Suggestions welcome.

Have a good weekend if I don't write sooner.

I Intend To Live Forever. So Far So Good.

In this, the latest segment of "my job is better than yours" we see some photos from work from a few weeks ago. The full gallery is available in my "Picasa" link in the "STALK ME" section of the side bar. Check out the side bar if you've got a chance because I've literally spent hours on it in the past week to make it more interesting and full. I've been meaning to post these pictures somewhere for a few weeks now and I figured it would make an interesting blog post. The guy and his friend built this car themselves and he races it around the country. Turns out he's from Douglasville, which is where I work and it also turns out that it's street legal which is cool. So he offered to take me around in it. He got it up to about 125mph at one point which was fun for me because I was easily the tallest person to ever ride in it and I had no helmet, seatbelt, glasses or anything to protect me from being impaled by a pebble or something. Suffice it to say it was awesome. Clicking on the photos should make them larger as blogspot apparently doesn't like photos to be very big on the entries themselves. All in all I've done some very cool things at my job. Most of you know about the thing with the Braves (see the aforementioned Picasa gallery for photos from that), I've also had the chance to meet a few NBA players, the best high school basketball player in the country Derrick Favors, Georgia State football head coach Bill Curry (see: former Ga Tech & Bama coach) and a bunch of WNBA folks. There were also several others I am probably forgetting in addition to the sorts of things depicted in these photos. Believe it or not, I'm not really bragging. Work is usually more of a pain in the ass than fun, but it's nice to spotlight the better things to remind myself they exist.

Since this post is pretty boring, I figured I could share something more interesting. A few weeks ago (aka "the olden-days") my friend Kelly and I devoted hours of our precious, precious lives to establishing a perfect Mixtape/CD of indie rock for popular consumption. That is, this mixtape may not be our 17 favorite indie songs of all time, but it's the exact sort of CD one should listen to should they want to try and get into indie rock. I should probably mention that some of the music on here (see: Bob Dylan), isn't really indie music but just seemed to fit the tone of the CD rather well. We're currently working on perfecting an alternative rock CD that I'll eventually share here as well. Anyways, this CD has a good number of songs you may have heard in the past, which was part of the point. It's just an introduction to indie, not necessarily representative of the genre as a whole. And just to clarify, I mean indie strictly in the genre sense, not the literal sense of "independent music" which is often quite different. Admittedly, some of these bands suck (see: The Postal Service), but the songs fit the feel so we're rolling with it.

1. The Format - I'm Actual
2. Ben Kweller - Sha Sha (How It Should Be)
3. Belle & Sebastian - The Boy With The Arab Strap
4. Of Montreal - Wraith Pinned To The Mist...
5. The Shins - Young Pilgrim
6. The Postal Service - Such Great Heights
7. Peter, Bjorn & John - Young Folks
8. Sufjan Stevens - Decatur
9. The Format - Dog Problems
10. Of Montreal - Disconnect The Dots
11. Joanna Newsom - Inflammatory Writ
12. Anathallo - Hanasakajijii (A Great Wind, More Ash)
13. Melanie - Brand New Key
14. Sufjan Stevens - Chicago
15. The Velvet Underground - Sweet Jane
16. Bob Dylan - Lonesome Day Blues
17. David Bowie - Queen Bitch

Also, if you want to make it a playlist (which can hold more music than a standard CD) I'd throw the following songs in there:

• Mika - Lollipop
• Mika - Love Today
• The Cat Empire - Sly
• The Flaming Lips - Yeah Yeah Yeah
• Belle & Sebastian - Stars Of Track & Field
• Peter Sarstedt - Where Do You Go To My Lovely (which, pending Kelly's approval, will be put in between tracks 7 and 8 on the above mix officially)

Actually, I could name dozens of songs you could throw into a playlist of this sort. If you decide to put this CD together, let me know what you think. My ego is my second favorite thing to have stroked. That is, behind my hair. Right.

Absolute Power Corrupts Absolutely. It Rocks Absolutely, Too.

LIST OF THE WEEK

I'll probably end up doing two different weekly gimmicks here. First is this one, the list of the week. The other is record find of the week, which sounds lame to probably everyone reading this right now, but it's a part of the reason I started this thing and part of the reason it's named what it is so suck a fat one.

Anyways, here's this week's list. Pretty soon all of my lists will be available via a sidebar link. I've been typing up my Moleskines (which has taken and will continue to take a ton of time) and I've been loading lists on to some list site for mass consumption. I should probably offer a disclaimer that I'm not arrogant enough to believe you will do anything with these lists. A lot of times they are about me (my favorites, things I own, things I want, etc) but sometimes they'll have info between the lines that might make you think "Paul likes these directors? Maybe I could check out a few of them" or something like that. That's up to you. I'm just going to post them. Feel free to offer feedback on the lists as I do this. Also, definitely feel free to request a list be done on something. I'm not going to be making a list of my favorite actors of Spanish descent but if you come up with something like that you'd find interesting, I'd be happy to make those sorts of wackier lists.

This week's list: Types of Samuel Adams I have tried (30!)
The order is alphabetical after the first two which are the common Sam Adams beers.

• Boston Lager
• Sam Adams Light
• 180 (Boston Restaurant Exclusive)
• 1790 Root Beer Brew
• Black Lager
• Boston Ale
• Brown Ale
• Cherry Wheat
• Cranberry Lambic
• Cream Stout
• Double Bock
• George Washington Porter
• Hefeweizen
• Holiday Porter
• Honey Porter
• Irish Red
• James Madison Dark Wheat Ale
• Longshot Boysenberry Wheat
• Longshot Dortmunder Export
• Longshot Grape Pale Ale
• Longshot Old Ale
• Longshot Weizenbock
• Octoberfest
• Old Fezziwig Ale
• Pale Ale
• Scotch Ale
• Summer Ale
• Traditional Ginger Honey Ale
• White Ale
  
• Winter Lager

The Worst Review of The Dark Knight You'll See

Wait, someone can't actually write a negative review of this movie, right?
Some quotes from friends about the flick:
"Believe the hype. Dark Knight is as good as advertised." - Rob
"I would have the joker's sick, twisted, demented little babies." - David, err, Private Pierce
"I just had a two-hour orgasm." - Kyle
"I can honestly say right now that it's in my top 10 favorite movies of all-time, and that's saying something." - Kisubika
"I quit my job and dropped out of school so I could devote the rest of my life to masturbating to this movie." - Ryan Simmons

Okay, that last one was made up, but you get the idea. Some people really, really like this movie.

Here's the thing. I liked it, too. There's a lot to like. It's creative to the point that you know it wasn't written exclusively by the comic book people, it's hilarious (the Ledger hospital scene still makes me smile), stylistically it's close to perfection (this and this alone is why most people get so moist over it), it doesn't insult your intelligence, it doesn't parody itself, it's better than Iron Man which everyone loved, and, yeah, Ledger does a damn good job.

But there's a lot to hate, too. I liked the movie more than I didn't, but I feel obliged to bring people back to earth.

First, if Heath Ledger wins an Oscar for adopting a funny accent and licking his lips, the Oscars are dead to me. I'm sure people have won for less, but come on. He was absolutely great, the tics were great, but we're talking about the best supporting actor in the world for one year. Did you see No County For Old Men last year? Javier Bardem won best supporting actor for his Anton Chigurh character that was essentially a lunatic eerily similar to the joker sans make-up, scar and accent. If you take those three things away from Ledger, you don't get Bardem. It's not even close. Ledger gave the performance of his life, he was creative, believable, outside of his regular persona, interesting and just damn good, but he's no Bardem. Unless it's a very weak year for Oscar-type movies this year (and it might be), it can't go to Ledger. Don't forget that most of what we like about this character was scripted. Ledger didn't come up with the absolutely brilliant philosophy behind why the Joker does what he does. He just acted it. We'll talk more about this next January when your loins have stopped tingling.

Second, I don't like Katie Holmes, but why replace her with Maggie Gyllenhaal (sp?) if she improves the character in no way? It was a distraction. Katie Holmes was awful in Batman Begins and Maggie was awful in The Dark Knight. What makes it even more frustrating is that they are both beautiful women in real life who are uglied-up in these movies and then constantly shoved in our faces in a "look how hot she is!" manner.

Third, semi-spoiler alert. Skip to the next one if you haven't seen the movie. Anyways, did the male character that died at the end of the movie really need to die? Obviously he did for this plot line, but they were brewing such a great character for the next sequel! Argh!

Fourth, so let me get this straight... Batman, who clearly has superhuman instincts, has come up with an invention with the help of his Wayne Enterprises people that does submarine sonar anywhere at any time. WHY? He's Batman! He doesn't need an invention that technology tells us cannot exist! It's not like the Bat-suit where we know we'll get to that sort of protective body armor some day or the Batmobile which could probably be built today, it's a technology we have not developed and probably won't any time soon, given to a character, perhaps the only character, that doesn't need it. He uses it for effect one time (to see the people a floor above him). Every other time he didn't really need it.

Fifth, one of my favorite things about this movie is also one of my least favorite things. It's going to be difficult to talk about it without ruining the movie, but I really liked how they didn't force anything to happen in the plot just because Ledger died. I, however, didn't like the way they left that plot line hanging. A little too vague, but I prefer a little too vague to some lame ending done just because Ledger's not going to be able to film a sequel.

Sixth, big spoiler alert here, too. You can't show us a character dying at the hands of the villain and then bring them back to life a few scenes later without a full, detailed explanation. I don't mind movies having fake deaths, it's fine. It's just that we saw the Joker shoot him. Did he just pretend to be dead instead of wounded? That's the explanation? And since we're on spoiler alerts, I guess we can go ahead and assume that the two main characters that stayed dead in this movie will be back for round three. I'm sure we'll find out falls and burns aren't fatal in Gotham. In fact, this problem is the most glaring instance of my least favorite recurring issue: there were a lot of things in this movie that could've benefited by a longer explanation. I don't need to have every single thing spelled out for me, but why are we supposed to be okay with never knowing who Gordon's mole was? They semi-reveal it and then excuse that person? What? Rachel cheats on both guys and this is okay? Huh? Ballet dancers (who in real life are skinny and not top heavy) are the best Bruce Wayne can get? Really?

To conclude I say again: I loved the movie, I just want everyone to keep it in perspective. It's not the greatest thing to ever happen. It's not the best movie of the year (I have it at 2nd, scroll down to see my list from last week and mentally insert it there).

Rest In Peace, Heath. I underestimated you.